Warning: This story is a bit racier than what I usually write...

So, this is a tale that is everyone’s favorite to hear…

When I was a young lass in kindergarten I was a goody-two-shoes and a tattle-tell. I guess you could say, was a hyphenated word. Well when I was in Kindergarten I was under the impression that ’forehead’ was a curse word.

Now, I’m assuming, that I thought it was a naughty because the only time I would use it to say, “Margo* I’m going to hit you in the forehead.” Then my mom would scold me, but she never told me what I did wrong. So I put two and two together, and figured out that it must be forehead. (I’m guessing, you can tell how intelligent I was back then.)

So now I knew a real-life bad word, but if you remember from earlier, I was a goody-two-shoes, and I was never going to use it again. Now, I only said top of your head, or the part of your head that is under your bangs (since I was in Kindergarten, EVERYONE had bangs, even the boys.)

But also, if you recall, I was a tattle-tale. Now one day, poor Joe** said something about my forehead. I could not stand by and let this vulgar happens. So I took my chubby short legs and marched myself to Mrs. W*** and shouted at the top of my 5-years old lungs, “MRS. W, JOE SAID THE F-WORD!!”

Now Mrs. W’s reaction only fueled the flame of my opinion on that word. The way she reacted was what I hope she would. I went away from school that day with a sense of pride and accomplishment. And for that day, I wanted to become a cop, so I could find low-life cursers and throw them in the brink. That dream was short-lived when my momma**** informed me that I would have to deal with burglars, murders, drugs, and drunk people.

Now this is not the only instance where I got someone in trouble for using the ‘F-word’, I was a machine in Kindergarten and got almost everyone else in trouble. Pretty soon, Mrs. W figured something was up, and talked to me about it. She straightened me out and informed me that forehead, and the ‘F-word’, are two very different words. I had to apologize to everyone who had gotten a frowny face because of me telling on them. It was the lowest point of my day.



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*This is my sister, I did not change her name. I did not feel the need of her being protected.
** The actual person’s name was changed to protect his identity, and to protect that I actually didn’t remember who he was.
***Her name was abbreviated for her protection… I’m so considerate.
****Now, I feel the need to add this… My mom is awesome! (:


MORAL: Kids, learn your cuss words ASAP, so you don’t look silly like I did!

Oh, you got me there...

So today I have four classes. I accidentally slept through my first two classes, and then I did not have to go to my third class. Well I went to turn in an application for something. During the three second walk from my dorm to the housing department, I was suddenly hit with a wave of nausea. When I have an upset stomach I drink Sprite, so I got me a can of Sprite. Right when I was almost done with it, I just started to throw up.

God is a funny person. I feel as if He was like “You’re going to skip class, I’ll give you a good reason.”
So now I am a miserable girl stuck in her dorm room. But I do have Pandora going, and it is playing The Beatles, so I can’t be entirely too depressed!

MORAL: Kids, set your alarm clock, and go to class. Also, just to be safe, keep a bucket by your bed.

oh well. sigh.

So this is not my first time blogging, but this is going to be my first serious attempt at this. At first glance, I really don’t have a bunch of things to say… but then I realize the hilarity that is my family, childhood, and daily life. I am going to be an emotional fountain, just spewing my most embarrassing moments, opinions, and other things that I find interesting at times.

So I thought the first thing that I could share is my most embarrassing moment in life. One day I was in the mall with my friends with the parental supervision of one of my friend’s mom (as we were in sixth grade and could not be in the mall alone…). We were walking over to go to the Dollar General-equivalent that this mall had. It was odd, though, because there was a mannequin in front of the store. I found this odd, because what Dollar General’s have mannequins? The mannequin was of a black guy, in one of those big ol’ fluffy gangster jackets. While I was walking by this mannequin, it moved, and I screamed, pointed at it, and ran away.

So to make this somewhat long story, that was not a mannequin, it was a real man. Also, that day my friends thought that I was really racist. After that I went and hid in the Dollar General wannabe store until that man moved.

MORAL: Dollar General’s do not have mannequins, they are just people who can stand really still.