Oh, Wait just a second...

Okay, so I thought I did not have a story to tell... But, boy do I. This will probably go down as the biggest Christmas fail ever in life.

So, I finally got a cell phone. Now the majority of my friends had cell phones. I mean expectant mothers-to-be received cell phones at their baby showers for their future munchkins. So I was way way way behind in the technological world.

Finally, my mother decided that I deserved/needed a cell phone. I got it like a week before Christmas Day. Right when I got it, I stole Margo's phone and started to program all of my friends numbers into my phone. Now this took up to a solid 2-hour block of my day. Keep in mind, this was my first phone, so texting was really slow for me.

After I added all my desired numbers into my phone, I sent out a mass text to everyone telling them that this was my number, and I was locked and loaded, and ready to text. Well for that whole time I texted all my friends non-stop. I had caught the texting bug, and my poor, overworked thumbs started to gain muscle mass.

One of my friends that I texted quite a bit was my good friend Caitlin. Now she was the only one that ALWAYS answered me; however, our conversations were totally weird.
They went kinda like this:
[my text normal, Caitlin's bolded]
Hey friend! This is Sarah!(: I have a phone now!!
That is really fantastic Sarah! I'm so glad to talk to you!
Yeah, me too...
*Christmas Day*
Hey! Did you have a good Christmas?
Not especially...
Oh, was Santa not good to you?
No, but I have a feeling that you could make it better. ;D
You're acting weird... But maybe before school starts we can go see a movie!
That would be just grand! How about tonight, after my family's Christmas lunch?
(side note: I knew this was weird, because Caitlin would not want to go out on a holiday, she would want to spend it with her family.)
Well, I don't know... So I will call you later.

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Okay, so I waited for about 4 hours, finally deciding it would be okay to call Caitlin. When I did an older gentleman answered. It sounded like it could of been Caitlin's dad. So when he said hello, I said "Hi, Caitlin's dadddd!"

The man on the other side was silent and didn't answer me, so I felt weird and I hung up. I just thought that Caitlin's dad may have not understood how to use a cell phone exactly so I just put it off.

Later that day I was looking at Margo's phone and just decided to look at her numbers. There were a lot of people who never texted me back, so I was just double checking to see if I had put in the right number. I just happen to go by Caitlin's number, and it did not match the one in my phone. I asked Margo if she knew she had Caitlin's wrong number, and she had said that Caitlin, herself, put the number in there.

So right then I figured out, that I WAS NOT TEXTING CAITLIN... I was one number off from her number. Actually, the whole week I had been texting a creepy old man.

Right after I figured this out, I called Caitlin (on her actual number) and told her what had happen. Caitlin told me she had kinda been hurt, because everyone was talking about how much I was texting them, and she never got one from me.

The man I was texting called me, and he left me a voicemail saying "Sarah, we really need to talk." Well, I never called him back, and he left a total of three voicemails. Finally, I sent him a text saying "Hey, I thought you were one of my friends, and clearly you aren't, so please stop calling me."

He never called or texted me after that, but I was slightly scared. I had told him about the high school I went to, what road I lived on, and what places I was going to during that week. Yeah, stupid me... I know.

MORAL: Never talk to your friends, they may be imposters...

(: You guys...

This really isn't one of my funny blogs. I just decided to do this one to thank all of y'all for your support already. You just make me so giddy! (: I just want you to know that I love you guys! Y'all are the best.

This is also kind of a filler, because I am not sure what to talk about next. My brain is a fountain of knowledge and stories, all jumping at the chance to pop out into this blog. Sigh, oh well, one day my stories will be told!

But I feel like I should add a little humor to this post, so I am going to look up one of the corniest jokes ever... and I will bless your eyes and mind with!


Why does a seagull fly over the sea?

Because if it flew over the bay, it would be a bagel. Duh. (:

I know that was a corny joke, but it made me smile.

Love you guys!

MORAL: Know a lot of really cool people, and plan things well. And don't fly over a bay.

This is what I'm feelin' right now. Thanks, Bruno!

So this past week and a half has been weird for me. I haven't been able to fall asleep, which makes my 'waking hours' weird. All I want to do is lay down and stare at the wall and just not do anything at all!*

Anywho, it is refreshing when you hear a song that embodies what you feel like at that particular moment. It just so happens that Bruno Mars has. (: His song 'Lazy Day' is exactly how I feel. Well, maybe not all that song, because there are some awkward parts... However, the chorus, is what is singing to me!



That is a perfect group of words to describe how I feel right now.


*You may find it funny that I am actually doing a blog while talking about not wanting to do anything... well, there goes my credibility.

MORAL: Don't do anything. Just listen to music and blog.

Grinds my Gears

This may not grate your nerves like it does to me. But I just have to let it out. Those darn CAPTCHA things. Every time I see one, I just want to punch something innocent. I know a little extreme. There are only a few things I hate with a burning passion. CAPTCHA is trying really hard.

The only thing that could possible make it a little less annoying is that it is a acronym*. And one thing that I love with a burning passion is acronyms. I guess you can see why this is a problem. Sometimes life is so complicated.

The only reason why they bother me so much is because they are there to tell the difference between humans and bots, but humans can't even read what they are!



They look kinda like this one. It clearly starts off with an 'a', and they only do that to lure you into a false sense of security and accomplishment. Then it goes straight into letters that are not from any alphabet I have encountered. Some of these 'letters' look like hieroglyphics, for Pete's sake!

It seems to me that the only thing that could possibly have the ability to read CAPTCHA's is a bot...

I just felt the need to get that off my chest. (:

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*CAPTCHA stands for Completely Automated Public Turing-test to tell Computers and Humans Apart... Which is a stupid one, if you ask me...

Disclaimer: I'm not against them, I just can't read them.

MORAL: Learn how to read weird CAPTCHA letters, it saves you a whole lot of time.

Warning: This story is a bit racier than what I usually write...

So, this is a tale that is everyone’s favorite to hear…

When I was a young lass in kindergarten I was a goody-two-shoes and a tattle-tell. I guess you could say, was a hyphenated word. Well when I was in Kindergarten I was under the impression that ’forehead’ was a curse word.

Now, I’m assuming, that I thought it was a naughty because the only time I would use it to say, “Margo* I’m going to hit you in the forehead.” Then my mom would scold me, but she never told me what I did wrong. So I put two and two together, and figured out that it must be forehead. (I’m guessing, you can tell how intelligent I was back then.)

So now I knew a real-life bad word, but if you remember from earlier, I was a goody-two-shoes, and I was never going to use it again. Now, I only said top of your head, or the part of your head that is under your bangs (since I was in Kindergarten, EVERYONE had bangs, even the boys.)

But also, if you recall, I was a tattle-tale. Now one day, poor Joe** said something about my forehead. I could not stand by and let this vulgar happens. So I took my chubby short legs and marched myself to Mrs. W*** and shouted at the top of my 5-years old lungs, “MRS. W, JOE SAID THE F-WORD!!”

Now Mrs. W’s reaction only fueled the flame of my opinion on that word. The way she reacted was what I hope she would. I went away from school that day with a sense of pride and accomplishment. And for that day, I wanted to become a cop, so I could find low-life cursers and throw them in the brink. That dream was short-lived when my momma**** informed me that I would have to deal with burglars, murders, drugs, and drunk people.

Now this is not the only instance where I got someone in trouble for using the ‘F-word’, I was a machine in Kindergarten and got almost everyone else in trouble. Pretty soon, Mrs. W figured something was up, and talked to me about it. She straightened me out and informed me that forehead, and the ‘F-word’, are two very different words. I had to apologize to everyone who had gotten a frowny face because of me telling on them. It was the lowest point of my day.



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*This is my sister, I did not change her name. I did not feel the need of her being protected.
** The actual person’s name was changed to protect his identity, and to protect that I actually didn’t remember who he was.
***Her name was abbreviated for her protection… I’m so considerate.
****Now, I feel the need to add this… My mom is awesome! (:


MORAL: Kids, learn your cuss words ASAP, so you don’t look silly like I did!

Oh, you got me there...

So today I have four classes. I accidentally slept through my first two classes, and then I did not have to go to my third class. Well I went to turn in an application for something. During the three second walk from my dorm to the housing department, I was suddenly hit with a wave of nausea. When I have an upset stomach I drink Sprite, so I got me a can of Sprite. Right when I was almost done with it, I just started to throw up.

God is a funny person. I feel as if He was like “You’re going to skip class, I’ll give you a good reason.”
So now I am a miserable girl stuck in her dorm room. But I do have Pandora going, and it is playing The Beatles, so I can’t be entirely too depressed!

MORAL: Kids, set your alarm clock, and go to class. Also, just to be safe, keep a bucket by your bed.

oh well. sigh.

So this is not my first time blogging, but this is going to be my first serious attempt at this. At first glance, I really don’t have a bunch of things to say… but then I realize the hilarity that is my family, childhood, and daily life. I am going to be an emotional fountain, just spewing my most embarrassing moments, opinions, and other things that I find interesting at times.

So I thought the first thing that I could share is my most embarrassing moment in life. One day I was in the mall with my friends with the parental supervision of one of my friend’s mom (as we were in sixth grade and could not be in the mall alone…). We were walking over to go to the Dollar General-equivalent that this mall had. It was odd, though, because there was a mannequin in front of the store. I found this odd, because what Dollar General’s have mannequins? The mannequin was of a black guy, in one of those big ol’ fluffy gangster jackets. While I was walking by this mannequin, it moved, and I screamed, pointed at it, and ran away.

So to make this somewhat long story, that was not a mannequin, it was a real man. Also, that day my friends thought that I was really racist. After that I went and hid in the Dollar General wannabe store until that man moved.

MORAL: Dollar General’s do not have mannequins, they are just people who can stand really still.